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A Limey Solution

March 1, 2017

 

 

So, if you read my post,

Into The Grey,

you know I've given up coloring my hair.

(Good-bye, spicy red-head!)

One of the reasons is that I just can no longer justify using the harsh chemicals they contain.

 

I'm also in the process of switching out my chemically-laced facial products

(Did you know that a very large portion of facial products contain formaldehyde???)

for natural ones.

(I'll get to that post sometime soon, I promise!)

 

Well, I've also recently become aware that there is cancer-causing aluminum found in deodorant.

Can you even believe it???

 

Why????

Why is this even allowed???

I mean, does the FDA not realize that they have allowed a

cancer-causing agent to pass their "stringent guidelines"??????

 

 According to the FDA, this is their mission.

 

"The Food and Drug Administration is responsible for protecting the public health by ensuring the safety, efficacy, and security of human and veterinary drugs, biological products, and medical devices; and by ensuring the safety of our nation's food supply, cosmetics, and products that emit radiation."

Oct 24, 2016

 

Seriously?!?

Somebody obviously needs to get fired.......

 

Look,

I'm sure they must have reasons for their lapse in judgement.

Or maybe they just care more about people not stinking

than they care about them not getting cancer.

I don't know.

 

All I know is that,

I have been smearing cancer into my armpits for the last 30 plus years.

It's a wonder that I'm not dead.

 

But, the thing is, you guys......

I also don't like stinking.

It's gross.

It stinks.

So,

what do I do???

I mean,

I seriously cannot continue using my cancer stick,

but,

I don't think I'd have any friends left, if I went without.

 

What do I do?

WHAT DO I DO???

 

This a quite a conundrum.

Sigh.

 

But, I think I may have found a solution.

 

So, I was in the grocery store a little while back,

buying some lemons.

While I waited very patiently for the sweet old lady in front of me to pick through the limes,

(always they are located right next to the lemons)

she turned to me and asked if I knew why she was buying limes.

 

"Ah.........no".

"No, I don't know why you are buying limes."

(In my head I was wondering if she knew why she was buying limes......

of course I didn't actually say that to her......)

She proceeded to inform me about the aluminum in my deodorant,

and that it had been linked to breast cancer in women.

She was bound and determined not to smear it on her body anymore,

and she had heard that limes were supposed to be a great alternative.

 

Now she had my attention.

 

"Really?" I ask.

"Yup." She said.

(Actually, I think she said 'yes'. I say 'yup'.)

She proceeded to explain to me that you simply slice up the limes,

and rub them into your armpits.

She then continued to explain that it was supposed to last a few days,

and that if you slice them up thin,

and use one slice of lime at a time for both pits, 

one lime should last for quite a few days.

It would be quite economical.

Plus, wouldn't it be worth it not to be using a cancer stick any more?

 

Yes, sweet old lady.

Yes it would.

 

You guys,

we chatted for quite a while about using limes as deodorant in the produce aisle.

People looked at us weird.

She didn't seem to care though,

so neither did I.

 

Plus,

I was totally intrigued.

Limes as deodorant.

Could it actually be true?

 

I need to tell you something.

I think using limes as deodorant is weird.

It is.

 

It's just that,

I think smearing cancer in my armpits is stupid.

 

So, 

I feel like I'm stuck with either,

weird,

or stupid.

 

I'm choosing the lesser of two evils.

 

I'm chucking my cancer stick in the garbage.

I just don't think I can continue to use it anymore.

 

I'm using limes as deodorant.

I'll let you know if it works.

If it doesn't work,

well......

 

Sorry.

 

Seriously.

 

 

 

 

(Just a little note here.

My girlfriend from Calgary told me about this home-made deodorant she has has been buying from a friend of hers. It's all natural and chemical free. Yay! Plus, she says it works! Double YAY! She has ordered me one, but, I don't have it yet. So, you know, until then.......limes. :D)

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